Femme Maison Two Drawings, Ink on Paper 19445-47, 91.3em x 35.6cm and 23.2c, x 9.2cmImages from this site--http://www.fantasyarts.net/bourfemme.html with some text on their meanings
I saw a Louise Bourgeois show with a good friend a little over a year ago at the Guggenheim Museum. I keep thinking of this series of Drawings and Paintings. I do feel so chained to my house. The family, everything. I feel so connected to these paintings and the things Louise has said about them, but remember how my friend and I thought that she must have been a horror of a mother, and felt bad for her children.
I have been dreaming of travel, and just the freedom of leaving this space and my family and just not having to be concerned with all this day to day stuff. Now how do I convince myself that I deserve to break away? What do I say when my husband and kids want to come along? And what do I want to do in this fantasy time anyway?
I dream of an entire day at the beach, alone, pre-seaon to just beach comb and read or write or draw......or do absolutley nothing. I am thinking this may be the year it happens. Just me. No one to worry about but me. I really think it is normal to feel like this. It doesn't mean you don't love your family, but like I always say, you can't miss them if you never get away from them. And coming home is the best part!!!!! I hope you get some you time!
ReplyDeleteIsn't it just a normal feeling to want to be experiencing something else? :) I have the opposite problem...I live by myself with the kitties, my husband is far away so the kiddies have to wait. So, the house has a whole different meaning for me...it's a cozy place, but it's a little bit lonely.
ReplyDeleteI'm up for a vacation, too. :)
Take care and enjoy the small bits of peace you have. :)
Jen
Thanks Staci and Jenny!
ReplyDeleteI don't feel quite so crazy anymore ;-)
We skipped vacation this altogether year and we really haven't traveled far since we became homeowners 3-4 years ago... And I really do work hard as an artist every single day.
I am going to try to find a wood fired ceramics or primative pottery workshop or something of the sort.... Mud, fire, that's my kind of thing. :-) Now to find this fun time, work it into the schedule and the budget!
Jenny-- I can remember when I lived alone, I think I always had the TV or Radio on for company, now silence is my friend :-) Thanks!